1. The Demand Man: Believes that it is your job to do things for him. If something he is supposed to do is not done well or correctly, you are at fault. While he can place as many demands on you as he wants, you are not allowed to place any demands on him. The demand man is above criticism and believes that he is a loving partner and that you should be grateful to be so lucky. If he is unhappy with anything, including your relationship, it is your fault.
2. Mr. Right: He knows better than you and therefore your opinions mean nothing. As such you should look up to him. If you disagree with his way of thinking, then you are sloppy. And when you do disagree then you are mistreating him and his opinions. If you could just accept that Mr. Right is better than you, smarter than you, then your life would be better.
3. The Water Torturer: He is calm in arguments and is snug and secure. If you try to talk to him about his behavior he calls you crazy and says that you are the ones with problems. The Water Torturer is calm to the point that he can convince even your family and friends that he is not abusive because he is calm. He is psychologically abusive and that makes it harder for you to realize that he is mistreating you.
4. The Drill Sergeant: This type of man wants to control your every move. He is very possessive and believes that your live should focus entirely upon him. He is extremely jealous and constantly believes his partner is cheating on him, so he isolates her. Her freedom is very limited and he may even have others report to him on her behavior.
5. Mr. Sensitive: He is very sensitive and demands a groveling apology if you offend him. If he offends you he feeds you psychological terms such as "Let the feelings go" instead of giving you a real apology. He also is against macho men and therefore cannot be abusive.
6. The Player: He is very good at making women feel special but she will never know where she stands with him. He believes that it is not his fault that women find him irresistible. He is constantly flirting with and cheating with other women. He is only in a relationship when it is convenient for him and does not care if you need something from him. Heaven forbid if you refuse him sex.
7. Rambo: This man is aggressive toward everyone, and actually likes to intimidate others. He is very much a "manly" man and signs of weakness must be avoided. Women are inferior, and something he sees as a possession. On the outside he doesn't believe that women should be hit or abused but if his own partner is bad enough, she is an exception.
8. The Victim: He believes that he has been wronged by people his whole life. If you call him abusive then you are just as mean as everyone else. If you try to leave him, he will present himself as the victim of your abuse. He also believes that his behavior toward you is justified if he feels you are first doing it to him. Above all he believes that his hard life is an excuse for his actions and that is not responsible for them.
9. The Terrorist: This man enjoys seeing you frightened. The terrorist is not above death threats, wehter they be direct or subtle. He seems to gain pleasure from your pain and is not above using children to torture you further. He wants you to be afraid so that you will stay with him and not cheat on him. He is also highly controlling and demanding.
10. The Mentally Ill or Addicted Abuser: Any of the men above may have mental or addictive problems, but many do not. These issues are not normally a cause of abusive behavior but they could be a factor. Quite often men with these problems believe that their addictions and not themselves are responsible for their behavior.
This is not a comprehensive list nor is it intended to give you an idea of how a man may be abusive so that you can recognize if you need to leave a relationship or at the very least seek help.
